Love is a vital force, not just an emotion or experience.
According to Ayurveda, love is not just an emotional state, but is a vital force that impacts our physical, mental, and spiritual health. The whole concept of wholeness can be narrowed down to love, as it is our true, genuine, authentic state of being.
Love is connected to the essence of Ojas. Ojas translates to vigor in sanskrit is considered our vital force of immunity, strength, happiness and love. When Ojas is balanced, we are able to give love and receive love harmoniously. When out of balance, we may close of our hearts to love and connection. If Ojas gets really low, and Kapha is affected; we may stay stuck in past pains or experiences and not allow ourselves to grief or move forward. This is important because holding on to resentments or fears can directly affect our health and immunity. Emotional processing is a huge part of health and well-being through Yoga and Ayurveda.
Love is connected to balance in relationship with Self, first. When we find harmony in how we flow with life and our responses; we can then take a look at how our flow in love is with others. Romantic love according to Ayurveda and Yoga is about bringing balance to the heart, the spirit, mind and body. When there is an exchange of love in divine partnership - romantically speaking, the elements are in harmony. If one does not take care of their own energy, and there is a dosha imbalance; this will effect our partner. A balanced mind + body will invite growth and deepen intimacy with others.
Here are examples of how the Dosha imbalances will manifest in romantic love:
Kapha may have difficulty letting go of the past, and holding grudges or resentment. This is problematic because everyone makes mistakes and not forgiving your partner will stump growth in the relationship and break connection due to lack of intimacy and inability to get close.
Pitta may have heightened emotions like rage and may be hurtful in their words due to their sharp tongue. Of course we always say things we don’t mean, but the fire overload will keep Pitta hot headed - which may create fear of vulnerability in their partners. They may believe they can’t be authentic in speaking their truth because Pitta may not be able to cool themselves own enough to be present for their partner.
Vata may have challenges committing to their partner or showing up consistently in a way that is necessary for them. The flighty nature of imbalanced Vata is unpredictable and can often lead to anxiety and fear in both Vata and their partner. This can definitely be unsettling for building a stable romance.
So it is important to understand your own nature in relationships first. Then, pour into building your Ojas and stamina both physically, mentally and emotionally. Stamina emotionally and mentally isn’t about building an armour around your heart, but instead embracing and willing to take on the challenges of love.
Ayurveda and Yoga would agree that to promote more harmony and balance, couples can practice gratitude for one another. This may be the quickest and most effective way to connect deeper in love. Through Metta Meditation or a pranayama like Nadi Shodna daily can help bring unity to mind and body; therefore being able to extend that to your partner.
In conclusion, Ayurveda sees romantic love as a vital force that can bring both balance and happiness to our lives. It also is a teacher and recognizes that it’s a responsibility of one’s self to pay attention to the imbalances in our own energies to be able to cultivate strong romantic relationships.
